"I hope you're not going to just leave your plate next to the TV, son!"
"Erm, I was considering it...that corner of the TV stand looks bare..."
"Nice try, Bucko. Now take it through to the kitchen and wash it up"
"Aww, Dad! Do I have to?"
"You wash your plate and cutlery....CLEAN...and put them away and I'll give you a dollar"
"Now why didn't you say so in the first place? I'll take Mom's plate as well now she's finished."
Money is always a good incentive, it rarely fails and although it's just one dollar I can put that towards my guitar fund.
One dollar and a few brownie points done, it's time to crack on with homework. I need to get it over and done with because I have got plans for today. Well, I say 'plans' but so far it consists of getting out of the house and then...well...make it up from there.
More praise but, sadly, no bucks from Mom as I crack on with my homework. It's useful having her around to correct my spelling as well.
I spend about 2 hours in total on my work and then, mid-morning, I'm free. Free for the rest of today. I wonder what I'm going to do with all that time. A question Mom is asking as well.
"So what are you going to do today? It's a lovely day outside...will you go out or stay here?"
"Definitely go out. Go down to the park, see who's there and hang out for a bit."
"Or you could invite a friend around to hang out here?"
"I'm not sure about that...I'd like to go out."
"How's things at school, Jamie..."
"Mom! I don't want to talk about it..."
"I notice you don't call your friends much and apart from that Morgan girl you don't invite them around either...or go to their houses. Are you making friends here?"
"Mom, I'm fine! It's just that...well...I'm not really...socially connected with a lot of the people at school. I mean I'm friendly with everyone but not in a group."
"Hmm, that's important to you, isn't it?"
"Well...it's like this...erm...I don't really have a 'role' in the groups at school. I'm more a freelancer, a lone wolf."
"Wolves like being in packs"
"I know...that's one of the reasons I want to go out today; meet people from school but outside of it. Get to know them a bit more."
"I understand. And are you still seeing Morgan?"
"No...at least I don't think I am. Two bad dates with her, I don't want a third!" OK, that's slightly untrue...I would say yes to a third date if she didn't blow hot and cold like she did on the last two.
"She's certainly...what you would call...'flaky'. I'm sure you can find a nicer girl to go out with."
Don't get your hopes up, Mom. Most of the girls around here can't even remember my name!
"Anyway, I hope you have a good time and find something positive, Jamie. You've put in so much hard work at school, you deserve a day off."
"He can always help me out in the garden if he's at a loose end..."
"Sorry, Dad, places to go, people to see...I'll help out tomorrow: Promise"
I go get my bike before Mom changes her mind about my plans for the day and Dad thinks up more chores for me to do. My first stop will be the youth club hangout at the Desert Bloom park. There's always one or two people from Buckingham or Copperdale High hanging around and, with any luck, one of them will be Judy Keith or one of her many friends.
I'm not quite at the desperate to be liked stage...yet. At least, I don't think I am but...dang it, I could do with a break on the social front. Whenever I start to make friends with other guys, they find themselves busy like Efrain or their parents make them study so hard they don't have time for a social life, like Rohan. Added to that are so many god-damn social hierarchies to be navigated and they're controlled by a small clique who determines who is in and who is out. At the top are two guys vying for control of the student body: Malcolm Landgraab, who is a real snooty creeep but his money talks and David Watts, captain of the school sports team, principal's favourite and who looks like a movie star. Fortunately I haven't crossed swords with Watts and I don't want to either! Landgraab's got my card marked as 'undesirable'.
I arrive at the youth club to find out I'm the first one there. I park my bike inside because there's been a spate of thieving in the area of late and bicycles are one of the things being stolen in high numbers.
To try and attract visitors I start playing the guitar there; it's my usual way of getting practice with it until I can afford a guitar of my own. I play a piece or two but, sadly, it's to myself.
I'm not sure where my musical style sits at the moment: A couple of years ago I liked all the teen idol stars like Tommy Roe, Brian Hyland and Bobby Vee but The Beatles ruined that for me...they were, simply, amazing. Everything changed once I heard "She Loves You" and then the Beach Boys raised their game and along came The Byrds, The Rolling Stones and now Jefferson Airplane. Music's going in all these different directions and I can't make up my mind which songs I should learn and perform. At the moment, given I'm limited to an acoustic guitar, I'm angling towards a kind of folk meets pop kind of vibe...so like The Byrds, I guess.
I put down the guitar and wonder what to do next when I see out the window someone I think I recognise...I exit the snug and start to walk towards the edge of the park where I see her and, yes, I do know her...well, kind of know her...It's Colleen; a girl from school who I met a couple of weeks ago right here. She's a friend of Judy's and almost as beautiful. What to do, Jamie boy, what to do? Is it right that I should just go over to her and start chatting on the basis that we've met just the once and that's all the justification of stopping her to talk? Aw, heck, what else am I going to do?
I break out into a run and make my way quickly to where she is before she leaves the area....remembering to slow right down just before I do reach her otherwise it looks like I was running specifically to catch up with her...which I was...but I can't be seen to be doing that because that makes me look desperate....which I am but that's not an important issue to address right now.
"Hello there, it's Colleen, isn't it?"
"Erm, yes, do I know you?"
"I'm Jamie. We met here a couple of weeks ago. You were with Judy..."
"Oh, you know Judy, do you?"
"I do. A bit...well since 6th grade on and off, mainly. In a kind of general, roundabout way socially."
"Oh yes, I remember now...you play guitar here sometimes? I thought you were called Paul?"
"No, I'm not a Paul, but yes I play guitar here...in fact you've just missed my set over there in the snug."
"Aww, shucks, I'm sorry...I remember I missed your other set last Friday"
Yeah, thanks for reminding me of that. You and Judy said you'd be there but you never showed. Instead I had Rohan, Efrain and Cassandra Goth as an audience, with Cassandra asking me to play more quietly after every song.
"There's always next time, Colleen."
"For sure...I really want to hear you play; a few of us do"
"Oh, really?" Now this sounds interesting.
"Yeah, Judy, Gillian..."
This just gets better and better! The trinity of the most groovy chicks in Sim City want to see ME play guitar!
"I'd better get practicing and I'll post a note up on the school notice board. You can all get front row seats"
"I like the sound of that, VIP treatment!"
"Hi Colleen, sorry I'm late"
Wait, what? Who's this? Some blonde chick has just shown up and interrupted our little banter thing me and Colleen have got going here.
"That's OK, Haley...we're still in time for the party"
"Party?"
"Oh, Haley...this is Paul, erm, I mean Jamie. Is that right?"
"Yep, I'm Jamie, nice to meet you....?"
"Haley. We've not met before, have we?"
"No, can't say we have. Nice to meet you too."
The whole Judy Keith Set is just pure beauty. I hope my critics are watching me from afar right now and noticing that, yes, I can have a nice conversation with pretty girls thank you.
"Haley, we need to get going if we want to get to the party before all the guys have taken over the pool...you know what they're like!"
"Ugh, total show offs; forming human pyramids and dive bombing everyone! Last time they really messed up my nice new hair do! We need to get there early and stake our claims to the sun loungers. Now do you have the tickets, Colleen?"
"I've got both our tickets here in my bag, don't worry. I'm wearing my swimsuit under my dress and the pool provide the towels. Are you invited to Judy's pool party, Pau..I mean, Jamie?"
"Oh sure, sure...I left my invite back at my house. I'll swing by there before heading to the....pool?"
"Yeah, you know, the big pool in town? We'll see you there."
"Nice meeting you, Jamie...hope to see you at the pool"
"Oh, totally. You just try keeping me away, ha-ha!"
OK...I now need a plan. If I ask the girls which pool that will tip them off that I'm not invited. So I'm going to race home on my bike, grab my swim shorts, and race back to the pool. Then I'll claim my invite was in my jeans which my mom washed and is now destroyed but I'm SURE my name must be somewhere on the list and...failing that, I'll just drop a few names and if I see Colleen or Haley I can wave them over and they'll get me in. A tricky and high risk plan but if it works...IF IT WORKS...I can get higher up that ol' social greasy pole and be surrounded by groovy chicks. I can see myself at the top of that human pyramid they were talking about. What could possibly go wrong?
"Hi Mom, hi Dad, just grabbing some swim shorts, see you later...don't know when...bye Mom, bye Dad"
...and out of there before they can even ask a single question! So now I'm heading for the big pool in Newcrest; that's the main one in town.
Getting in was easier than I thought. The guy at the front desk just took the basic admittance money and waved me through, no questions asked. OK, let's get changed, get in that pool and schmooze my way to popularity!
...or maybe I'm too early? Aww, let's face it, I'm in the wrong place! There must be another swimming pool in the city I don't know about and that's where the party is. It's clear; I'm just not in the loop and my encounter with Colleen this morning just underscores that. Did she genuinely want me to be at the party or was she asking if I was going as a sign of whether I'm one of the in crowd or not?
The only group meeting here today is a children's swimming lesson. They have it easy, kids today. All the different clubs and groups they can be part of, no overly complex social pyramids to negotiate and all girls are yuck or, if you're a girl, all boys are yuck. That makes life much simpler and less of a gut wrench when you get things wrong...
I guess the swim itself, in a quiet pool, is nice enough and I'm trying to take some positives from it. I've certainly got time and space to think while I'm here. There's plenty of people out there selling messages of taking chances, taking life by the horns, getting out there and being proactive but I've done all that and ended up failing at what I want.
But what do I want? What did I want from that party, had I made it, had I been allowed in? On the surface I want to be surrounded by beautiful girls like Judy, Colleen, Gillian, Haley and a whole host of others. OK, so you're surrounded by them, Jamie, then what? Well, I suppose I like one of them and they like me enough to go out with me, go on dates, kiss, cuddle and then go to the next level...what every guy my age wants. I want a share of the love pie...OK, take Malcolm Landgraab or Marcus Mueller...those guys are complete jerks and yet they've got girlfriends. Malcolm went out with Gillian for six months, dropped her and is now dating that French exchange student. And Marcus, who's he going out with? Only Yuki Behr, who is one of the nicest and most decent girls in school and she's dating a jerk!
It's time to move on, again. Where to? I have no idea. I'm not that familiar with Newcrest so I've spotted a café nearby and I think I'll grab a bite to eat there.
Dried, dressed and ready to go I leave the pool and...as luck would have it...I spot my buddy Efrain in the distance. I say 'buddy' but I haven't seen him outside of school for a couple of weeks now so I don't know if I'm still in his good books or not. But at this stage I could do with some friendly company.
"Efrain! Wait up! It's Jamie!"
"Jamie! Man, it's been a while. What are you up to?"
"Well, I was trying to find a pool party but instead all I found was a pool with no party"
"Whose pool party were you trying to find?"
"Judy Keith's...it was a long shot; I wasn't even invited but I went to the wrong pool."
"Ouch. Well, I didn't even know there was such a party. Anyway, I'm glad to see you, Jamie...I've had a crazy couple of weeks!"
"Oh yeah? Do tell"
"I had a few dates with....Cassandra Goth...they didn't go well."
"You and Cassandra? I wouldn't have guessed that"
"We were in the school library one lunchtime and well, she liked what I was reading and was an expert in the book so she helped me finish my homework and...well...she's pretty in a way and useful for when homework becomes too difficult so I asked her out on a date to see a movie and she hated it; kept criticising every last little detail..."
"Which movie did you go and see?"
"Major Dundee....anyway, I then took her for a meal and she kept going on and on about the starving children in Africa so that was it, really. She just has this way of killing any enjoyment when you're hanging out with her. So, Jamie, how's your love life? Still pining for Judy?"
"Not given up there yet but I also had a couple of dates with a girl...Morgan Fyres"
"Morgan Fyres! Wow! Respect, my man! She is seriously hot in a strange way...like, got that whole Beatnik style down to a T."
"She is hot, that's for sure, but she's hot and cold big time. 'I want to be with you, Jamie!' 'GET AWAY FROM ME JAMIE!' I changed my mind, I want to be with you, Jamie. I couldn't stand it anymore."
"That is the red headed temperament for you, Jamie. Anyway, what are you up to this evening?"
"I haven't thought about that. I put my hopes on gatecrashing the pool party."
"Desert Bloom Park? Hang out at the snug...mind you, I'm getting hungry so shall we stop off somewhere along the way?"
"Or...we could swing by the market, get some hamburgers and buns and grill us up some food at the park...that way we can lure in some company as well."
"Good idea, Jamie, I like the way you think"
We swung by the market to get some things we could BBQ with and then headed back to Desert Bloom Park to cook food for ourselves and friends we weren't sure would be there or for other teens we've never even met.
Efrain doesn't know how to cook, even to flip a burger, so I get him slicing the rolls. I enjoy doing this and I look out to see if we're getting approving looks from other people in the park...well, we are, but they're mainly from the kids on the climbing equipment.
We sit down and eat a burger or two. OK, there are no cute girls around but it's good to catch up with Efrain again after not seeing him outside of class for a few weeks.
"Thinking about it, Jamie, I rushed into things with Cassandra because she was the first girl who payed me any attention. I didn't stop to think about whether we'd get on with each other at all. There's a lot to be said for patience."
"Yeah, it was similar with me and Morgan but she did come on strong with me at first. I think she's being pressured into doing wild and crazy stuff because she's got a strict home and she's holding a candle for this Wolfgang Munch character...I think she shows up at my place whenever she's trying to make him jealous."
"Wolfgang Munch, you say? There's a lot of rumours about him, none of them good."
"So how are we going to improve our social lives, Efrain?"
"Hmmm, now there's a question! Hey, you play guitar...chicks dig guys who can play music."
"I'm trying that...it's not quite working out..."
"...yet. Give it some more time. Maybe getting a band together would be a good next step."
"Yeah, I thought about that some time ago but the only person who sounded interested was Rohan Elderberry. Do you know him?"
"Yeah, I know Rohan a bit. Bit of a nerd but he's OK. Why not talk with him again about setting up a band...heck, I'll even dust off my bass guitar"
"You would? That's great! Now I've got to track down Rohan"
"He's standing over there..."
"So he is....wait here, I'm going to invite him to join us."
Never let a good opportunity go to waste, as they say. Rohan said he played piano and was the most enthusiastic about starting a band back when the idea was first floated.
"Hey, Rohan, how's it going my man?"
"Jamie? Oh hello. I'm fine. Sorry I haven't been around a lot lately; my folks make me study real hard but I haven't given up on that band idea, I really haven't!"
"Good man. That's exactly what I wanted to talk with you about. Efrain over there is going to play bass and if you still want to play organ or piano in our band that would be fab."
"Yeah, count me in, bud! Oh man, this is gonna be awesome! Hey, look out, that's Lulu Strang coming our way! She could be a groupie because she's so cute!"
"Lulu Strang? Isn't that the girl no chick in our school likes? I've heard some stuff about her like she steals other girls' boyfriends and that she smells..."
"They say Lulu smells?" says Rohan a little too loudly and it attracts attention...mainly from Lulu Strang herself. Oh no, she's coming over to us and she doesn't look happy.
"Did I hear my name being mentioned?" She sounds angry and she's fixing us both with a hard stare. Another woman is walking right past us and she heard what Rohan and I had said: Now we're pariahs with women.
"Erm...no...not at all! Erm...we were talking about something completely different...what were we talking about, Rohan?"
"Not you, Lulu, not at all, we were talking...about..."
"ZULU STRONG! That's it, we were talking about that new men's cologne; Zulu Strong, and how that smells."
"How does it smell, boys?"
"It makes you smell like...erm...what do you think it smells like, Rohan?"
"It makes you smell like...a....erm...a Zulu, of course!"
"What is a Zulu supposed to smell like, then?" Lulu has now crossed her arms and is still fixing us with a hard stare.
"A very good question, Lulu...we've not met before, I'm Jamie..."
"Jamie McGregor. I've heard your name being mentioned before...you're supposed to be a bit of a pathetic joke who fancies himself as a pop star. And you, Rohan, don't fare much better: Everyone thinks you're a loser."
Well, that's kind of taken the wind out of our sails and made us all feel bad about ourselves. At least I no longer have to think about what a Zulu smells like and how it got bottled for sale.
"So, yeah, boys...either everyone we know at school is a jerk or we really are a smelly boyfriend stealer, a pathetic joke who fancies themselves as a pop star and a complete loser. Which one is it?"
"I'm sorry, Lulu. It was mean of us to repeat gossip in front of you."
"Thank you Jamie; it gets so tiresome to be labelled as something you're not."
"So I'm not a complete loser then?"
"That's not quite the take away message here, Rohan, we upset Lulu."
"Oh yes, sorry. Hey, Lulu, we're putting a band together..."
"Are you? What are you called?"
"We haven't got a name yet; we're really at the planning stage. But it's going to be me, Rohan and Efrain in it."
"OK, you guys sound serious"
"Oh we are, Lulu, and you should come and hear us rehearse some time"
"When we've sorted out a few things first, let's not be too hasty, Rohan. In the meantime I play a set over in the clubhouse there every Friday evening...so if you want to see me...solo...you're more than welcome to."
Lulu just acknowledges that but she seems taken by Rohan, who is doing his best "aw shucks" puppy dog eyes look. I'm also detecting no bad odours from Lulu so I'm guessing that whole rumour has no basis in foundation.
"Well, Lulu, we'll make sure you get front row seats to our first gig"
"Thanks, Jamie, I look forward to it and if you need a singer..."
"Do you sing?"
"Yeah, I can sing, I'll come and audition for you"
"Cute girl singer, could be a plus for the band, eh Rohan?"
Its times like this when ideas are buzzing around and there's plenty of enthusiasm for something that I feel alive and at my happiest. Sure, I missed out on the pool party but meeting Ethan, Rohan and even Lulu Strang was even better. Onwards and upwards; nothing can stop us now!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Meanwhile, over on the other side of the park, Gillian Hills had just arrived and was keen to see who else was around. All she could see were Jamie, some skinny kid in clothes that were too big for him and....the accursed Lulu Strang!
"Oh dear, Jamie" thought Gillian. "What are you doing bothering with the likes of Lulu STRANG? How can you stand the stench? *sigh*, I thought you might have had potential, Jamie, you might have made the grade but...you are judged by the company you keep. OK, just keep walking by like you don't know who they are..."
