CHAPTER 131: Swiss Cheese Memory

 

"Set me up with another one" said Action to the bartender.

"Sure thing, Action.  You're starting to become a real regular down here" the bartender replied.

"I like the vibe"

"Well, not much is going on right now...the Kitten Show isn't until much later; that's when this place gets really buzzing"

"I thought I'd avoid the crowd on this occasion."

"Shame...I mean, apart from catching the Kittens in action Mr Cuffe is usually down here as well and you might want to catch up with him.  There you go, another Bourbon.  I'll put it on your tab, shall I?"

"Sure.  You know, people keep talking about how me and Alan Cuffe know each other but I can't remember ever meeting the guy."

"Seriously?  I've been on shift twice when I've seen you and he talking." said the barman, surprised.

"Don't remember either time" replied Action, downing the drink in one gulp.

The barman was about to say something but thought better of it.  Clearly Action was wrestling with a problem and he didn't know the guy well enough to pry.  To some customers he was a friendly face to pour out their woes to but to Action, he knew he was the kind of guy to wrestle with his issues alone.

"I'll settle up for the drinks now" said Action.  "But if you say I was here talking to Alan Cuffe I have no reason to think you're lying.  I just can't.....well, maybe I had a lot to drink those nights.  OK, catch you later" he said, getting up and throwing a 10 Simoleon bill on the counter.  "Keep the change"

Action left the Kitten Club and walked around the neighbourhood mulling over the information that he had two conversations with the proprietor, Alan Cuffe.  Why couldn't he remember either of them?  Cuffe was a bit of a local celebrity:  Publisher of Lothario magazine and owner of The Kitten Club...two well known but controversial enterprises.  Surely he'd remember meeting that guy?  Up ahead he spotted a familiar face; Saya Kobayashi.  He maintained a network of informers and useful contacts who he could call on for information...well, now seemed like a good time to call on one of them now; Saya.

"Hey, Saya, you got a minute?"

"For you, Action, I have 10" she replied.

"I'm working on a case...or at least I was...and I'm trying to fill in a few blanks.  What do you know of the Leanne McGregor case?"

Saya took a deep breath and let out a sigh.  "You know the FBI have taken over that from your precinct?"

"So they tell me.  Anything else?"

"Well, they're working on the angle that she's a Russian spy.  Or at least one of the Soviet Bloc.  Other than that you know how the Feds are; they play it close to their chests."

"Any known accomplices?"

"None have been named but the night you pursued her..."

Action nodded although he had no recollection of that evening.  He'd heard Suzy Kent mention that chase but try as hard as he might, there was nothing in his memory about it.

"...they reckoned the only way she could have got away from you so quickly is that she had a getaway man nearby:  You got startled by some headlights and that's when he swooped in to pick her up."

It made sense from an outsider's perspective but the trouble was; he wasn't an outsider to those events but now he might as well have been.  His conversation with Saya was interrupted by someone he vaguely knew:  Geoffrey Landgraab.  He was out on his daily run and he stopped when he saw Action up ahead and decided to walk over to him.

"Detective Action, out and about I see" said Landgraab.

"Mr Landgraab" said Action, nodding curtly to the man.  

"I'm wondering if you're working on any big cases at the moment?" said Landgraab.

"Nothing major, why do you ask?" replied Action.

"Oh in case you decide to harass my son again, that's all.  But as far as you and the SCPD are concerned we're not involved in any major investigations, is that right?"  Landgraab seemed intent on pressing this point, which seemed odd to Action.  Saya looked on at the interplay between the two men, wondering how Action would respond.

"Not that I'm aware of" said Action, slowly and cautiously.  "You've got something to hide, Mr Landgraab?"

Geoffrey let out a short laugh.  "Oh no...we're legitimate but you know how there were rumours about us and, well, that arson incident" he said.

"I don't know anything about that; it's with the FBI." replied Action.

"You know nothing about that, eh?" replied Landgraab, looking suddenly cheerful.  "That is interesting.  Well don't overwork yourself, Detective...good day"

Landgraab resumed his run and as Action and Saya watched him head off she said "that sure was a strange tone to take with you, Action:  What does he know that you don't?"

"Right now, a whole lot of things" replied Action.

___________________________________________________________________________

Action had more places to go today.  He'd been avoiding having a conversation with his girlfriend, Katherine, as he was meant to be meeting her on that day where he lost his memory.  The knowledge that something should be there in his head, that things happened only a few days ago but for some reason it was completely gone and, as a result, he ended the day by standing her up was eating at him.  He would completely understand if she was mad at him.

There was a café down Windenburg way that was a favourite spot of theirs:  It was quiet, discrete and served traditional Italian and Austrian style pastries and Action thought they made the best damned coffee in the city.  He saw that Katherine had already arrived there so he coolly walked over to her and kissed her on the cheek.  She, on her part, didn't shy away.

"So what's this all about, Action?" she asked him outright.

"Crazy stuff's going down, darling.  Let's grab some coffee and I'll tell you about it." he replied.

"So what happened to you the other day, when you stood me up?" said Katherine after they sat at one of the cafe's tables.

"I don't know" replied Action.  "I have no memory of that day except to find out that I'm down at the Planet Honey Pop bar...which is a place I can't stand...with no recollection of how or why I was there.  It's been eating me up for days...I go into work to find out I'm supposed to be working on this high profile case and...nothing.  I know nothing about it but they all tell me I've been working on it for weeks.  I've had to pretend that I know what's going on...covering up my lack of knowledge.  Anyway, they turned the case over to the FBI because there's a possible spy angle, I don't know.  I don't know a whole bunch of things right now.  And do you know what's really weird?  I'm there, reading these reports on this big crime like it's the first time I've heard of this case and it's written by me...it's my signature on the bottom of the documents!  It's like....it's like I've stepped out of my body and mind and am watching things like I'm detached!"

Katherine said nothing but instead reached out her hand across the table to hold his.  Action looked into her eyes and saw a look of concern. 

"Do you think..." she said after a while "...that you're suffering from some kind of trauma related to your time in Vietnam?  I mean, I hear about battle stress or fatigue and how it affects soldiers...even when they're not soldiers anymore"

Action shook his head.  "The thing about war is that you don't forget...you remember.  You remember a lot of things you wish you could forget.  No, this is something else and I gots to know what's going on here:  What's real and what's not?"

Katherine looked around the area, deep in thought.  The two of them sat in silence for a moment before she spoke.  "Action, it seems like a very specific event has been 'removed' from your memory.  I don't know what caused it, I can't begin to think how it could have been done, but my guess is that that day we were supposed to meet in the evening...you did something else that day that related to the case you can't remember"

Action let out a deep breath.  "I've considered that.  Dammit!  How do I recover that memory?"

"What about seeing a psychiatrist?"

"No!  If I do that and the police department finds out, I'll be suspended from active duty...be put behind a desk.  I don't want that on my record!" and with that he pounded the table with his fist.

"But you need professional help!" said Katherine, leaning towards him in conern.

"Yeah, but it'll be my kind of help!  You're right:  I have to do something but seeing a shrink ain't it!  I'm a detective, dammit, and a good one:  I'll piece it together!"  He finished his coffee, got up and left the money on the table for the waitress.

"Oh no you don't!" said Katherine, standing up as well.  "You're not going to go anywhere without me on this one!"

____________________________________________________________________________

It was very busy in downtown San Myshuno.  There was the flea market, the hustle and bustle of the food market and street music throughout.  Action and Katherine walked around the stalls and watched the busker play.

"So, who or what are we looking out for?" asked Katherine.

Action scanned the surroundings and replied "A contact.  One time they were an enemy but now...."

"They're a friend?"

"Not quite, but a heck of a lot friendlier than when I first met them.  There she is now"

Action signalled to a woman standing on the edge of the food court.  She had short, black hair combed forwards, wore heavy eye make up and wore a yellow plaid shirt over black slacks.  She was once known as "The Brain"; one of the top cat burglars in Sim City but her name was Aurora Ahmed...now a reformed criminal and police informant.  She saw Action and walked over to him.

"Hey, Action...who's your friend?" said Aurora.

"This is Katherine, Katherine I'd like you to meet Aurora Ahmed.  Aurora's my number 1 expert in the criminal underworld"

Aurora looked Katherine up and down and nodded, impressed.  "I take it you're off duty" she said.

"I am and this is strictly off the books, you dig?" said Action.  "Let's sit down and talk...I have a little proposition I'd like to outline to you."

"OK, Action, what's the deal this time?" asked Aurora.

"That case I was working on:  Leanne McGregor.  I want you to find out everything you can about her especially associates.  I don't think she works alone."

"Oh man, I told you that was too much for me to handle!" protested Aurora.  "No" she said, shaking her head.  "I'm out of this one, find someone else"

Action leaned across the table and looked her dead in the eye.  "So you found something out last time, did you?  I want to know what that is!"

Aurora took a deep breath and looked around.  "I...I..." she couldn't finish her sentence.

"I'm off the case:  It was handed to the Feds but I gotta know what's going on and I'm the one taking the big risk.  This time it's personal.  Tell me what you found out"

"Is she cleared to know?" said Aurora, nodding at Katherine.

"She's cleared.  Now spill the beans" replied Action.

"OK..." began Aurora.  "Your theory that she's a Soviet agent?  She ain't." 

"Alright, then who is she working for?" asked Action.

"They're called The Visitors.  I don't know what country they're from, I don't know who they work for or if they work for anyone other than themselves.  But get this...they have access to all kinds of weird stuff like lasers, those remote bombs found at Alan Cuffe's house, cars and craft that can be made to become almost invisible..."

"Oh come off it!" said Katherine in disbelief.

"Listen, doll, I don't care if you believe it or not, this is real!"  said Aurora, tersely.  

"Go on" said Action.

"They're also....telepathic.  They can read minds, hypnotise others..."

"Whoa right there!" said Action.  "Actually hypnotise people?  Yes!  It all makes sense!"

"I'm glad someone thinks so" said Katherine.

"Do you know if they can remove memories some someone?" Action asked.

"I'm not sure of the details" said Aurora.  "But I guess so"

"How did you find this out?" asked Katherine.

"It wasn't easy, believe me!" said Aurora.  "I did some digging around, starting at the end point of the Cuffe bombing and the attempt on Lilly Feng's life.  So I....well, 'obtained' some documents from Mrs Feng which led me to obtaining some other information from the Landgraab Corporation and these people...The Visitors...keep cropping up in top secret documents.  You owe me, Action."

"I can settle your expenses, off the books" said Action, pondering this new revelation.  "I think we all need a drink now"

Action and the two women headed over to the Waterside Warble bar for drinks but when Action went to the bar to place an order he noticed a familiar face already there.  Someone who was also embedded in this case:  Suzy Kent.

"Yo, Suz" said Action, greeting her.  "I think I've got the lowdown on the Visitors you mentioned...but let's talk where it's a little less crowded."

"Absolutely!" replied Suzy, enthusiastically.

Action described to Suzy what Aurora had told him.  She stood there, speechless for a few moments.

"Can you handle that?" asked Action.

"They sound superhuman!" she said, in a quiet voice so not to alert the other bar patrons.  "Are you sure this Aurora isn't yanking your chain because you arrested her a few months ago?"

"I'm a pretty good judge on who's on the level and who's spinning me lies, Suz" said Action.  "I believe her and it all fits in with the police reports AND what happened to me.  You found me in that bar, not being able to recollect anything from that day."

"But...actually erasing memories?  How do they do that?" asked Suzy.

"How does that tree lead to that grotto you found?  I ain't been there yet, but I'm telling you it all fits like a glove.  Between the two of us, we've found something that's beyond anyone's knowledge."

"What do we do now?  Tell the F.B.I.?" 

"Those turkeys won't believe us...no, you and me gotta delve deeper into this mystery.  You work your side of the street, I'll work mine.  We gotta deal?"

"We gotta deal" nodded Suzy.

After finishing his drink, Action introduced Aurora to Suzy.  "This here's my co-investigator, Suzy Kent" he said.

"The 'Hey, Wow' columnist?  Is she up to the job?" asked a sceptical Aurora.

"I don't just cover the fashion beat and I also have half the story of what's going on" replied Suzy, defiantly.

"So anything you can share with me, Aurora, you can share with her" added Action.

Suzy headed off to her next engagement and Action briefed the rest of his "squad" about what to do next.

"OK, this is strictly off the record...no cops, no Feds.  Just us for now.  Aurora, I can pay you expenses if you need anything to help crack this case."

Aurora nodded.  "OK, Action, I'll be in touch"

Aurora headed off as well, leaving Action and Katherine alone.

"Action, are you sure this is a smart move?  Not involving your own colleagues?" she asked.

"Babe, who's gonna believe us about mind reading, laser guns and the like?  No, I need cast iron information before I turn it over officially." he replied.

"It's beginning to sound like revenge, Action" she said with a hint of worry in her voice.

"They took part of my mind!  That's a violation I can't explain properly.  You just gotta trust me, Kat, on this one."

They walked home, making small talk but something was in the air...a tension between the two of them.  Outside of Action's home they stopped to talk and speak what was on their minds.

"It could get dangerous, Action" said Katherine.

"I know...which makes this next part more difficult" he replied.

"This next part of my life's gonna get rough.  I'm going after people...heck, we don't even know what kind of people they are...who can do all kinds of scary-ass stuff.  I need to do this next part on my own."

"On your own?" asked a surprised Katherine.  "But we've been together on this one for so long!"

"That's before it got freaky.  These "visitors" have all kinds of advanced weapons and abilities.  If they get me, they can get you and I can't let that happen!  You need to stay out of this, Kat.  This is my fight!"

"So is it over between us?" she asked, tears welling up in her eyes.

"I only want to put us on hold, babe.  I will come back" he said, holding her hands.

"I'm afraid you might not" she said.

"The hood, the Cong, the punks...ain't none of them made a scratch on Action.  But it's gonna get hairy out there.  I'll see you down the line, Kat"

He gently stroked the side of her cheek as she shut her eyes with sadness.  "I....know." she said, her voice cracking.

They kissed, one last time, and then Katherine hailed a taxi to take her home.  Action watched her leave and then headed home to bed.  He was angry:  He was going to hunt these Visitors down and make them pay!

CHAPTER 130: One Track Mind

 

Corrrrrrrrrrrr! This is the life! A new house, a new place to live, wide open spaces...not like that cramped apartment we used to live in and I can ride my bike without worrying about whether I'm going to knock someone over or having it stolen. Jamie McGregor; today is the first day of the rest of your life, me laddo! I wonder if there are any cute chicks in this neighbourhood?

I held up my end of the bargain...I sorted out my stuff in my new room, put the posters up; that sort of thing.  Mum and Dad are much better at finding places to put the crockery, TV and hanging paintings up than I am.  To be fair, the removals guys did most of the heavy lifting work, I was only going to get in the way of professionals by interfering; fair's fair.

Now who's THAT?  Attractive blonde lady...maybe a bit on the older side but, hey, she's can move a bit!  Maybe that's who I need to meet, an older, more sophisticated lady who can show a bright and enthusiastic young man of 17 years a thing or two?  Maybe not...getting involved with a woman the same age as my mom is a little freaky.  I wonder if she has a daughter my age?

Well, that's a successful reconnaissance mission...pity there were hardly any people...especially girls...around.  But, early days.  Better get home because Mom's probably made lunch by now and Dad will be hollering for me to hold a shelf in place whilst he drills holes in the wall.  I know my parents so well.

"Ah the wanderer returns...how's the neighbourhood?" 

"Fine, Mom, it's a nice day for a bike ride.  Hmmm, this is delicious, thanks.  Is Dad going to join us?"

"He's eaten already; he's just finishing putting the bookshelf up.  Now..."

Oh, here it comes...the request.

"...I think it might be good if you offered to help with the rest of the unpacking, or..."

"Or?"

"Do your homework.  I'll leave it up to you"

That's Mom's way:  Present me with two less than desirable options and make it sound like I chose one of them.  The last time I helped my Dad do something involving wood, drills and hammers he missed the nail and hit me square on the thumb.  I had a bruise and cut there for six weeks.

"I'll do my homework"

"Oh, Jamie's doing homework is he?  Will wonders never cease?" 

"Ha, ha, Dad.  At least I won't get my thumb hurt this way"

"I told you, I was startled by that pigeon that hit the window that day"

"What subject are you doing there, Jamie?"

"A book report on Great Expectations...although my expectations won't be so great if I keep getting disturbed."

"That's telling us, Myra!  Come on, let's get the rest of the bedroom stuff unpacked"

After I got to grips with Magwitch I felt I had earned a rest.  The advantage of doing your homework on the dining table is that my folks can see that I'm actually doing the work I've been set.  Mom didn't even insist on reading what I'd written:  Maybe, after all these years, she trusts me to do a decent job?  Maybe she sees that I'm 'maturing'?  Becoming a more well rounded individual. 

"Now don't forget to put your name on your book report and put it...carefully...into your school rucksack.  Don't just leave it lying around there; I need to give the table a good clean before dinner!"

"Yes Mom...got the report here!  Oops, I hadn't put my name on the report.  Ha-ha!  There, that's done!"

"Family meeting!"

"What, now Dad?"

"Yes, we must celebrate our first day in our new home!  Come, let's gather on the sofa!"

He's going to do a speech, I just know it!  "Four score and seven years ago this day, we set out from San Myshuno to Oasis Springs to ensure the McGregors shall not perish from the face of this Earth!"

"Now when we set out from San Myshuno last night..."

I wasn't far off

"...little did we know just how quickly we would settle in.  Now this is an opportunity to improve not just this home, but our lives.  We now have space to entertain, to work from home in more comfort and to enjoy a pleasant, quiet neighbourhood."

I won't bring up the subject of whether I can throw a party just yet...

"I wonder what the neighbours are like, Colin?"

"I have no idea, Myra.  Anyway, that bookshelf is now firmly fixed to that wall and now we can bask a little bit...Jamie, where are you off to?"

"I thought I'd go for another bike ride...down to the park?"

"There's a park?"

"Yeah, it's not far.  I thought I'd check it out.  Part of my reconnaissance mission...phase 2 if you will"

I'm too restless right now to lounge around at home.  I need a boost to my social life and if this street hasn't got any talent, I will find somewhere that does...the park seems as good as place as any to start the search.

The house next door looks very smart indeed; not a single thing out of place.  Now, by contrast, the house opposite...if I can call it a house, is more like an old trailer, jacked up on stilts or something like that, and has definitely seen better days.  I wonder what our neighbours are like?  I wonder if the smart house next door has a groovy chick living there?  A groovy, single chick!

Now we've arrived, let's check out the scene....hmmm, it looks pleasant and quiet.  Too quiet.  There's no one here except for that guy asleep on the bench.  Great.  The only other person here is a bum.  OK, looking around, there's a BBQ area, a fishing pond, it's great for the kids who want to climb on that frame...shame we didn't have anything awesome like that when I was 10.  And...what else?  Wait!

That heavenly vision in red!  That might be the most beautiful woman I have ever seen...and I've seen every Julie Christie movie that's been made!  I should go over to her and say hello.  Who am I kidding?  It'll come out of my mouth as gibberish and she'll look at me as if I've escaped from the loony bin.  But then I might never see her again!  OK, what to do?  Take a deep breath, Jamie, walk over cool and calm as you like and say "hello...my name is Jamie...no, James.  Hello, my name is McGregor, James McGregor...oh no, that would sound really bad coming from me...no, I must be cool, more like Dean Martin cool and...oh, she's gone.

Oh well, that's that I suppose.  Let's check out this area...hmmm, nice.  Nice couches, an open fire, a selection of reading...I wonder if there's anything 'spicy' here.  This would make an ideal hang-out.  I wonder why that guy out there doesn't nap in here instead of on a cold, stone bench?  Wait a minute, who lit this fire?

Actually, I like it here.  It even has a guitar just lying around.  I wonder if it belongs to someone in particular or whether it's part of this clubhouse?  I mean, you don't go leaving a guitar lying around if you don't want people to play it?  OK, let's give it a go...

"Watcha doin'?"

"What, wait?  Oh, hello...you startled me there for a moment.  Lost my place in the song"

Not that I'm complaining!

"You're not too bad"

"Well, I'm finding my style, you know?  Yeah, looking into taking my music to the next level and all that"

Play it cool, Jamie, play it cool.

"So, I recognise you but can't quite put a name to your face.  I'm Jamie McGregor."

"Yuki Behr"

"Oh, would you happen to be Candy Behr's sister?"

*sigh* "Yes...not like I can ever escape her shadow.  'Are you Candy's sister?  Can you get me her autograph?'"

"Oh, I didn't mean it like that!  I mean, I don't particularly want her signature or anything...I meant as a way of....erm...clarification, that's all.  Well, erm, do you play any instruments?"

"Yes, but I'm bored with the whole Beat Scene..."

"Oh..." She's a right barrel of laughs.  "I'm new here to this park...so is this a kind of hang out?"

"Yes.  I come here quite a bit.  Mostly high schoolers though.  I'm at Buckingham High.  You?"

"Same...funny how we've never crossed paths before"

"It's a big school"

"So...would you like to hang out... with me... for a bit?"

"Sorry, I'm waiting for my date"

Nghhhh!

"Oh...date.  Going anywhere nice?  I hear that British movie, Afie, is supposed to be good."

"No.  Off to a party"

"Nice.  Well, maybe if you're interested, you would like to go see that movie with me sometime?"

"Maybe...oh, here comes my date now"

"Hi there, Yuki...well, Jamie McGregor...fancy seeing you here"

"Hello Marcus"

Marcus Mueller...thinks he's something special.  The other day he claimed he was chatted up by this cute female doctor.  I don't believe a word of it!  AND he's Yuki's date as well!  How unfair is life?

"Sorry I'm late, Yuki, but are you ready to head on to the party?"

"Whose party is this, might I ask?"

"Oh, don't you know?  It's at Judy Keith's house...hmmm, but then again how would Judy Keith know you?

Thanks, Marcus, rub it in that I'm invisible to Judy Keith...the most glamourous and desirable girl at Buckingham High.

"So I guess you'll be looking after the youth club on your own tonight.  Have a good shift.  Come on, Yuki, we don't want to be late"

"Bye Yuki, have a nice time"

"Bye, Jamie"

Well, that's just great isn't it?  Marcus somehow, mysteriously gets Yuki Behr to go on a date with him AND they get invited to Judy Keith's party!  Well, I have my books, I have my fire and I have my guitar.  Maybe not everyone's going to Judy's party and they'll show up here?  

Hang on, who's that headed this way?

Oh no, it's Cassandra Goth!  Of course she won't be invited to Judy's party; she'd just bring the mood down.  She's heading straight for the club house!  I'll be stuck here with her jabbering on about the 'inevitability of death' or 'the cold, bleakness of space' or some other kind of doom-laden depressing observations on life...or in her case, death!  I wish she cheered up!  OK, Jamie, your bike is over there...it's just a short run...stay low, stay fast and she won't spot you.  Except for this bright, yellow, light reflecting shirt you're wearing!  Oh no, she's getting closer.  OK, it's now or never...just run to the bike, don't look left or right, focus on the bike and get out of Dodge!

CHAPTER 129: Can I Count On Your Vote?

 "Dear Oasis Springs District Council.  My name is Edna Sneedley and I represent the League of Decency, an organisation you've no doubt heard about.  I am writing to complain about the shockingly..."

Edna broke off from typing to consider one word.  "Shockingly"?  That sounded a bit clunky for a letter of complaint.  Maybe "extremely" or "worryingly"...worryingly sounded good; as if to sound a note of warning if things weren't dealt with promptly.  Yes, and she must use the word "promptly" later on.

At that moment George entered the study.  "Good morning, dear" he said.

"Good morning, George.  I'm just writing a letter to our local council after what we saw down at Desert Bloom Park yesterday.  It was very worrying."

"Indeed it was, Edna, you just don't expect that kind of thing to happen in a shared community space.  It's the donkey I felt sorry for.  Can I be of any assistance here?"

"Should I take a polite approach to writing to the council or a more hectoring tone?" she asked.

"In this circumstance I would adopt a tone of concern with a hint of admonition" replied George.

"You're so good with words, George.  This is why I need you."

"How has your first week as an official politician gone?" asked George.

"Exhausting...it's so hard on my delicate feet, George.  I'm out there on the streets canvassing people, letting them know about our cause and do you know it's like talking to brick walls sometimes?  So many people these days are so disinterested in the kind of political issues they should be concerned about."

Edna recalled a nasty encounter the other day with a man on the street who fired a few colourful metaphors at Edna.

"Maybe you need an assistant, a personal escort to fend away those kind of ruffians" said George.  "The next time you go out canvassing and I'll come with you"

"Would you George?  That would be wonderful!  And the next time I don't want to be walking in the hot sun for hours on end...it would be better to go to some cool, shady place indoors."

THE SOLAR FLARE LOUNGE, A FEW MINUTES LATER

"Did you hear?  The Chinese have detonated another atomic bomb!  Apparently their largest one yet...AND Cleveland have recorded their lowest temperature in history!  Snow and ice in May!  I'm telling you, are these two events connected?  Eh?  Eh?" said the old man at the bar.  George and Edna had ordered their usuals and got chatting to the clientele.

"Well, the rise of China in recent years cannot be ignored.  We saw what they did in Korea!  My husband, George, was there.  Weren't you, George?" said Edna

"I was.  Terrible business." said George.

Edna and George engaged in conversation with the people at the bar until some of them drifted away, leaving the Sneedleys to have a quiet discussion. 

"You see, George, this establishment is where we need to be at, not that low brow Rattlesnake Juice Bar.  You get a better class of clientele here, more refined"

"More old people" said George.

"Precisely.  People who have seen better times when standards of decency were both expected and adhered to.  We need to canvas these folks, make them more amenable to our cause.  Let's get another round of drinks in first."

"I do think that talking about the war seems to go over well with the more senior citizens here" said Edna.  "Make a point of telling them that you served in two foreign wars"

"Well, my war record was pretty mundane.  I didn't see much action, except for that one time in Korea when our depot was infiltrated by Chinese spies disguised as cook house workers." said George, shrugging his shoulders.

"The point is you were in the Navy for 14 years and served your country wherever it needed you." said Edna, trying to encourage him.

She worked her political charm on some of the other patrons; including a pair of friends who'd known each other for 20 years.  One of them was staunchly conservative, his friend quite the opposite.

"I mean, look at the way you dress!" said the conservative man.  "What are those slacks you're wearing?"

"I'll tell you what they are, they're comfortable, that's what they are!" replied his friend.

George, in the meantime, was trying to impress himself on other customers but with decidedly mixed results.  He got into a conversation between a man who carried an air of both authority but with a hint of menace and an elderly woman who was on to her 4th drink.  The man seemed familiar to George.  Had he met him somewhere else before?  He racked his brain trying to think of where they'd met.

I didn't catch your name, Mr?" asked George.

"Jacques Villareal." said the man, plainly.

Villareal?  Villareal?  George swore that name sounded familiar.  "Have we met before, Mr Villareal?"

"I doubt it." Villareal replied.

"Hmm, it's just that I've heard that name somewhere before.  Was it in the news?" George asked.

Villareal downed the rest of his drink and placed the glass firmly on the counter.  "Yes.  My wife went missing a few years ago" he said, eventually.

"Oh yes!  I remember now!" said George, sounding relieved.  "Weren't you a suspect for a while?" he asked, tactlessly.

Villareal turned slowly to face George.  "Officially, I still am" he said, quietly, but menacingly.  "I'll be sure to pay close attention to your League of Decency, Mr Sneedley.  Very closely." and with that, Villareal left the bar.

"I can tell you're the strong, silent type" said the tipsy old lady sitting at the end of the bar.

"Who?  Me?" replied George.

"I reckon behind those glasses are the eyes of a passionate man, a man who knows what he wants and where to find it.  A man not afraid to defy social convention..." she said, batting her eyelashes at him.

"I NEVER defy convention, madam.  And I'm a married man!  Begone, and bother me no more!" he said, sternly.

"Trouble, dear?" asked Edna when she returned to the bar.

"Not any more" said George, shuffling a seat further down to put more space between him and the drunk old lady.

"I think you're much better at canvassing than I am" said George.  "You should approach people and I can back you up or add some detail"

"I see some younger people are arriving now...maybe we should change our approach?" Pondered Edna.

"Hmm, that might be difficult" said George.  "We're pretty much against everything young people like these days"

"Then we must model good and proper behaviour...be an inspiration"

They knew they had their work cut out for them when the first man under the age of 40 they spoke to asked "hey, where are the women at?".  It turned out he had only one thing on his mind and that was not something Edna considered to be appropriate conversational material.

At that moment the barman stepped away from serving drinks and walked over to the microphone in the corner.  He switched it on, tapped it a couple of times to see if it was working and cleared his throat.

"Ladies and gentlemen; The Solar Flare Lounge is pleased to present the teenage violin sensation...Miss Eliza Dudley.  Please give her a warm round of applause."

There was a ripple of applause in the club; Edna and George looked on in interest.  "Now this could be edifying" she said.

A young woman in her late teens with flame red hair and wide, heavily made up eyes walked out to the performance area of the lounge.  She was wearing a long, black sparkly evening gown and carrying a violin.  She nodded shyly to the audience, put the violin under her chin and began to play.

"Now this is more like it...it gives one hope for the next generation...although she might want to choose a dress that doesn't show so much décolletage next time." said Edna.

George looked at his watch "Time for work, dear, good luck with the rest of your day.  I hope you convince more people" he said before trudging off to the hotel restaurant where he worked.

Edna purchased another drink from the bar and considered what to do next.  The music here was fine but she felt she'd tapped out the clientele for voter support so with the evening just beginning she pondered where to go next.

"Excuse me, barman...is there anything going on in the city that you could recommend?  Somewhere not horrid and seedy but more cultured and wholesome?" she asked.

The barman stroked his chin and hummed in thought.  "I think the Spice Festival is taking place in San Myshuno tonight.  Let me check the diary."  He reached down under the bar and pulled out a large black book.  Flipping over some pages he came to today's date.  "Yeah, Spice Festival...that's near the Waterside Warble bar.  Do you want me to write this down for you?"

"Yes please, that's very kind" said Edna, smiling enthusiastically at him.  Downtown San Myshuno was what was known as a 'target rich environment'.

THE SPICE FESTIVAL, 7:20pm

The square outside of the Waterside Warble was filling up with lively people, some dressed in exotic Asian costumes, others had donned shorts and t-shirts as it was a warm, balmy late Spring evening.  Edna looked overdressed in comparison but she wasn't concerned; after all setting a good image was her metier.  She noticed the gaudily painted pavement art, the paper lanterns and Asian inspired decorations.  One banner reminded her of a wooden painted piece of art George brought back from Japan in 1953.  There was a sign over a table which read "Take the Taste Test Challenge" and there, laid out on the table were various pots and bowls of food which she didn't recognise at all.  She approached the man running the stall. 

"Good Evening, Madam" he said.  "Would you take the Taste Test Challenge?  We have a variety of delicious foods from all the continents of the world right here.  Each bowl contains something twice as spicy as the previous one.  Sample all 12 and you win a prize of dinner for two at Chez Llama."

"I don't recognise any of these dishes" said Edna.  "So this thing, this event runs every so often I hear?"

"Yes Ma'am" the man replied.  "It's one of the most popular festivals in the city.  Would you like to try the Penne All Arrabiatta from Italy?"

"Yes...that sounds nice, I'll just put my drink down there and try some..." she said grabbing a bowl and a spoon.  She took a small spoonful and gingerly put it to her lips before taking a tiny bite.

"Hmmm, there's a certain amount of picante to the sauce...mostly pleasant...now may I have a few words with you about law and order in this part of town?  How bad is the crime around here?"

"Please, lady, why not try this dish now.  It's from Africa and it's called Suya...it's a kind of kebab cooked in traditional spices." said the man, offering up a plate.  Edna took a sip of her drink and then went to sample the dish.

"Hmmm, the aroma is....interesting....the taste is....OH MY!  OH MY!  PUT IT OUT!  PUT THE FIRE OUT!  DRINK!  DRINK!  WHERE'S MY DRINK?  I NEED MORE DRINK!  ARRRRGHHH, IT BURNS!"